ABOUT ME
Before entering into the coaching profession, I was in a corporate position for many years, in a deadline driven and revenue driven environment. It was both a blessing as I learned so much and a curse, with a whole lot of stress in staying focused on meeting and exceeding the revenue expectations of my employer. I worked in print advertising media. I rose through the ranks from account executive to manager and director by exceeding expectations of my employer and by learning all there was to know including things outside the scope of my position. You could say if someone needed an answer to something typically, I knew where to direct them to find the answer or I had the answer they sought. I learned every aspect of my company and it required a lot of effort, creativity, perseverance, patience and resolve. I was then a single parent and needed to work so it was my belief that in order to stay employed I had to be a superstar, supermom, superwoman proving myself worthy over and over and over. There was a price to pay as the capes I wore,wore me down and the price to pay for this self-imposed belief was a proverbial crash of my health.
I was so overly identified with the role of being this ultimate human being that I lost sight of my true identity, my values and my worth. It took a health challenge to turn in a new direction aligned with who I am and what I felt I was on this planet to do. It didn’t come easy. Of course, there was a pity party when I resigned from my position with no “next” in my plan. I lost 5 weeks of paid vacation, sick and personal days, great health benefits, a title and lots of great relationships with clients built over the 15 years I had served the organization. But I gained so much more.
At the time of this great unraveling, I found my way to the coaching profession. It wasn’t something that I sought. In fact, I didn’t even know 15 years ago that coaching was a thing. Quite by accident I heard the term first at a workshop where a book writing coach was the facilitator. I have always liked to write and since I hadn’t found my “next” yet, I spent time revisiting my long-lost gifts and attending personal development programs and courses that would assist me in my “what’s next.”
After the workshop lead by a coach, I yearned to know more about what a coach is. The line at the workshop to ask questions of this coach was long and I decided to wait in the parking lot for him to emerge. My questions weren’t about book writing but about the intrigue I had for the profession he was in. I looked like a stalker I am sure as I waited for him to exit the building. When he finally exited, I exited my car and stopped him in the parking lot.
I asked him if he could describe what a coach does/ or is. He explained that coaching isn’t what most people think it is. It is the process of deep listening, asking discovery questions and honoring the other person being coached already possesses the answers they seek. That’s all he said and then I knew. A light bulb went off inside and everything became crystal clear.
I understood that I have been a proficient listener of perfect strangers for a good portion of my life. I recognized and could site examples of all the times I went into a grocery store, a video store, a convenience store, a park almost anywhere and I would be engaged in listening to a person’s private life as they struck up a conversation with me over a can of beans, selecting a DVD, or purchasing a pack of gum and how I would listen and empathize with their condition and just allow and hold space for their story. I didn’t understand until now that I must have a trusting aura in order for people to feel comfortable enough to share their challenges with me.
And referencing back to what a coach is, I knew in an instant this was my purpose. To offer a safe space where someone could be heard, perhaps for the first time in their life, without judgement and without trying to fix it. And the missing piece was training to learn how to ask the right questions for someone to discover what they truly want for their life.
I trained with Coach University Inc. a worldwide coaching institution which offers accreditation and codes of ethics in an unregulated profession. I launched my coaching profession starting with pro-bono coaching for 1 year accumulating hours as prescribed to obtain Accredited Coaching Certification, and I never looked back. It’s been 15 years in practice.
It was through my training I tapped into an alignment with my deeper skills and felt the rewards as my clients also stepped into their alignment with their vision for a life that was more fulfilling enabling them to feel contentment. My vision for my coaching practice wasn’t simply to be a sounding board but to teach my clients necessary skills to be able to look within for their answers, providing the tools to reference when life throws curve balls, teach how to set healthy boundaries so that long after the coaching relationship ends, they can be armed with the confidence and tools that they can resort to in any situation they may encounter. A great coach isn’t one who has had a perfect life, oh no, it’s someone who has gained wisdom through hardships, practicing resilience, working through their shadow self perpetually.
I furthered my certifications through Achology and International teaching program where I learned Mindfulness Practices, Neuro-Linguistic Programing (a tool that uses language to rewrite new neural pathways) Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (a way to question thoughts that may be old stories, belief systems that keep people from moving forward) and much more.
There is no one size fits all in coaching, it is individualized depending on the goal of the client within the sessions and what they would like to accomplish. I offer complimentary 30 minute informative/ coaching sessions for those wishing to learn more about the process. If you are ready to take responsibility for your life, get in touch.
Warmly,
Sue Birkam, ACC
